IP Development Mentorship Week 5


DISCLAIMER: I don’t mind you guys sharing my thoughts about the mentorship with others. However, if you don’t see the art or writing bits up at SongofExile.com, that means I’d prefer you keep it between us!  Enjoy!:)

Hard to believe this week is already come and gain!  It’s going by so fast now that I’m in the thick of working on my book trailer/pitch.  The week was spent implementing critique from my pitch to a story director from Blizzard and Riot Games, our guest speaker from last week.  Response to my story was good, though a lot of important character motivations seemed to get lost in translation.

This week, I tried changing the narrative framing of my book trailer, but it’s still missing something important. I had yet another critique from an outside party at the end of the week, this time a screenwriter, and again I’m running into the questions of what and why are certain things important?  They’re responding well to what they *think* the story is about and seem to enjoy it, but it’s the really specific character moments that aren’t quite hitting the mark yet.

(NOTE:  Because I’m talking about my pitch so much, I’ll be sure to share a preview of it once it’s in a more polished state!)

The upside to all this revision, however, is that getting critique from someone farther away from my story helped me realize I’ve been looking at it so closely it’s hard to tell where it’s lacking because I know all of the background information that newbies don’t.  Another positive aspect of having an outside party critique my work has been the validation of having someone completely new to it saying it’s friggin awesome!  We’re so focused on what’s wrong with our work that it really feels good to hear we’re doing something right!  That simple fact has me so inspired to move forward even outside the bounds of this mentorship experience.  Validation can be priceless!

And so here I am about to bulldoze my pitch entirely for a 4th time!  If I’ve learned anything from this mentorship, it’s that story development is all about destruction and creation, my friends.  It’s a maddening and exhilarating process!

For now, I’ll leave you with my short elevator pitch, which I’m happy to say I AM quite pleased with! I doubt it will change significantly from this:

Political strife plagues the desert kingdom of Astaria. When his stern warrior father tasks him to bring order, the libertine prince, Ramah, must abandon his life of ease and confront the realities of a land on the brink of war. Struggling to navigate his father’s expectations, Ramah must dig his people out of the hole his carelessness has sunk them in. Song of Exile spans a life of blood and passion, tears and hatred, as Ramah finds the best decisions sometimes exact the highest price.

This Week’s Art Wrap-Up:

I’m still in the thumbnailing phase and considering I’m about to blow apart my pitch for week 6, I expect I’ll still be in this phase for awhile, yet!  I’ve added a few sequences here and there since last week, but this grouping of thumbnails is going to be vastly different by next post!


Read about the rest of my journey with the IP Development Mentorship here:

Week 1
Week 2
Week 3
Week 4
Week 5
Week 6
Week 7
Week 8
Final Week
Final Critique